Bribery By Way of Croissants
by onecelestialbeing
Summary: A long and very much overdue gift for Stardustandwands. Drarry/Dramione/Harmony moments.


Hermione turned over in bed, waking slightly when something soft brushed against her nose. The sensation stopped for a minute, and she fell back into slumber, never once opening her eyes. Seconds later, the tickling started again, and it lingered long enough to make her finally pry open one eye.

"About time, Granger. You sleep like the dead."

Opening the other eye, Hermione hissed in slumberous annoyance and flipped onto her other side, bunching a pillow beneath her head.

"Go away, Draco," she snapped, tugging the duvet up to her ears. "You know I like to have a lie in on Saturday."

"So is that any reason to leave your Floo unwarded?" another familiar voice asked. Hermione didn't bother with turning around to acknowledge the second wizard; she would have known that voice anywhere.

"You know perfectly well that I did not leave my Floo unwarded," she retorted. "You two illegally Flooed into my house! And since when do Aurors break into people's houses? Aren't you supposed to be upholding the law?"

"Well it wasn't my idea!" Harry offered, the sound of his trainers making a dull thud on the floor as he walked closer to Draco. "It was this one who said you would get mad if we broke in, but that you'd forgive us afterwards."

Realising that it was futile to resume her sleep, Hermione flopped over onto her back before sitting up in bed. She was wearing an old t-shirt that used to belong to her dad as pyjamas, and her curls were all over the place. She suspected that she had a bit of dried spittle at the corner of her mouth, and was sure that her face was blotchy from sleeping with her cheek smashed against her bedding, but there was no reason to put on airs, especially since Draco and Harry were the ones that had unceremoniously barged in on her.

"What are you two doing here, anyhow? Aren't you supposed to be on holiday in south of France?"

"We were; rather, we still are," Draco replied, moving to the foot of Hermione's bed and sitting down. "We were having a rather _enlightening _conversation over breakfast—by the way, I've brought your favourite croissants; freshly baked, I should add—when the topic turned to you." He waved a basket with a fancily-embroidered light blue cloth tucked inside in her direction.

Roughly brushing her mussed curls away from her face, Hermione glared at the smug, basket-brandishing blond wizard sitting across from her, before turning to glare at his boyfriend, also her best friend.

"The croissants are a bribe; that much is clear. But what for?" Hermione asked outright. "And what time is it in France now? How the hell were you two having breakfast? And how the hell did you procure baked goods that are still warm from the oven?"

"It's merely a matter of knowing the right people," Draco loftily told her. "Now are you going to eat before it gets cold?"

"Harry, would you be terribly upset if I slapped your boyfriend?"

The messy black-haired wizard had the nerve to pause as if pondering the question, and Draco feigned hurt.

"Are you really going to let Hermione slap me?"

"Do you really think I could stop her if she wanted?" Harry asked in the same intonation.

"You both are idiots," Hermione muttered, shoving the blankets away from her body and sliding out of bed. She paused to yawn and stretch, exposing a sliver of tummy between the waistband of her pyjama bottoms and shirt. When Draco pretended to wolfishly leer at her, Hermione reached over to cuff the back of his head.

"It's too early to deal with you and your perverted tendencies," Hermione told him through a yawn. "At least let me fix some tea first."

Once her tea was brewed and a croissant lavished with butter and jam sat before her, Hermione wasted no time in breaking apart the fluffy pastry and shoving it into her mouth. She was swallowing the last of it when Draco began speaking again, and his words nearly caused her to choke.

"So Harry here has never been with a woman and we'd like to know if you would be that woman."

Hermione gagged so hard on the flaky bread that she had to take several gulps of her still too-hot tea to clear her throat. She ended up burning her tongue and then ran back into the kitchen, fanning her mouth with one hand while filling a glass with cold water with the other.

"Come again?" she rasped out after draining the glass and soothing her scorched mouth.

"You heard him right," Harry mumbled sheepishly. "I toldDraco that it was a bad idea to ask you, but he insisted..."

"So much for easing into things; you could have warned me, you prat. Wait a minute—you're a virgin? In that sense?" Hermione blurted out, uncaring how tactless she sounded. "I thought you and Ginny, well...you know."

"Yeah, things never quite panned out that far," Harry explained, nervously rumpling his hair. "Not that she didn't want to, but it was more a case of me not being all that interested. By the time I'd figured out that I fancied blokes, she'd moved onto dating someone else."

Hermione nodded. After Ginny and Harry had parted on good terms, it was only a month or so before she began dating Oliver Wood. Harry never seemed to have a problem with it, and Ginny was obviously happy with her new beau. Draco and Harry as a couple had been a bit of a surprise, mostly because Hermione had always seen the two trading exchanges that had all the warmth of an ice cube. The fact that Harry liked men and not women didn't shock Hermione, as she'd had her suspicions long ago. However, they had remained unfounded and she hadn't been bothered enough to ask.

But his and Draco's current proposition? It was something she had _not _been expecting.

"Why me?" she asked, sitting back down at her kitchen table and roughly snatching another croissant out the basket. "And I thought you two fancied men."

"Why not you?" Draco asked. Frowning, he reached over to steal a bit of croissant from Hermione's plate. "And just because I'm bent doesn't mean that I've never enjoyed company of the female persuasion."

"Besides, wasn't it you that claimed they fancied the idea of being with two men at the same time?" Harry asked, groaning in pain when Hermione kicked him beneath the table.

"Yes, and if you remember, I was completely pissed when I said it!" Hermione shrilled, spraying the table with crumbs. "And it was the golden boy's fault; Draco I _told_ you to stop refilling my wine glass!"

"What fun was that?" Draco replied unrepentantly. "Bloody hell, Granger, the mouth you have on you after you've tossed back a few. There's no need for extra entertainment with you around. The things I've heard...I think you could make a brothel owner blush!"

On the verge of throwing both grinning wizards out her house, Hermione picked up her mug and scowled into her tea. Draco owned a home that her entire house would most likely fit in, and often threw parties that they forced Hermione to attend. Gone were the days of the brooding younger Malfoy. In its place was a more social, carefree wizard, one who still had a razor-sharp tongue and sarcastic wit, but often used it to make others laugh or put snotty people in their place.

Hermione's main reason for trying to bow out most of the time was because she didn't feel like getting all tarted up to rub elbows with Draco and Harry's posh friends. But either wizard would threaten to Floo to her house and sling her over their shoulder to make her come out and socialise if needed. Not wanting to be toted around like a sack of potatoes, Hermione would acquiesce, and she always ended up having fun.

The last party she'd drank more wine than usual, and Draco had been the one to announce her inability to Floo back home, thus carrying her to a guest bedroom. Hermione vaguely remembered nuzzling her face into his expensive linen shirt and mumbling something about him smelling good, that he and Harry both smelled good and why couldn't she find a good-smelling boyfriend to carry her around? Before drifting off to sleep, still in the perch of Draco's arm, she'd gone on about him and Harry making a Hermione-sandwich out of her. Hermione hadn't realised that Draco remembered her inebriated rambling, but the next morning he and Harry giggled and carried on so much like a group of firsties that she threatened to hex the hair off their balls if they didn't stop laughing.

Draco, in his crass way, told her that he didn't have any hair on his balls and offered to show her. Hermione blushed to the roots of her hair while Harry laughed and nearly fell out his chair. After announcing that she hated them both, Hermione threatened to leave and Draco promised that he and Harry would behave if she stayed.

While her blunder had been brought to light by a most decadent red wine, Hermione would only admit to herself that her words had been tinged with truth. The naughty recesses of her mind had often wondered what it would be like to have a threesome, also what it would be like to watch another couple go at it. She'd definitely heard Draco and Harry in the throes of passion while prowling their house in the middle of the night and it had done little more than pique her salacious curiosity.

In her defense, it wasn't her fault she'd gone past their bedroom and overhead them having sex. She'd been trying to find the kitchen in the labyrinth of Draco's manor, as she flat out refused to summon a house-elf. Immediately she knew that she should have covered her ears, but their deep mingled, masculine groans immediately sent a jolt to the centre of her body, and the throbbing in her clit had been hard to ignore.

Lingering in the hallway for some time, Hermione had to pry herself away and scurried back to her room, forgetting all about her reason for leaving in the first place. Shoving off her pyjama bottoms and slipping beneath the silky sheets that made up the guest bed, she'd lowered one hand to her crotch and had been shocked to find that she was dripping wet. Replaying Harry and Draco's moans in her mind while fervently rubbing her clitoris brought her to a strong and hasty climax, and she'd had to bite down on her bottom lip to keep from screaming outright.

"You can say no, Hermione," said Harry, breaking her from her thoughts. "It was a silly idea and we aren't offended if you're put off by it."

"I'll do it," she suddenly blurted out, surprising them and herself.

"Really?" Harry murmured, his green eyes wide with shock.

"Yes!" Hermione snapped. "When are we going to do this?"

"Blimey, Hermione, there's no rush," Harry told her. "I suppose it'll just happen when it happens. We didn't mean to get to it right this minute."

"Well, I know _that,_" she told him exasperatedly. "Besides the fact that I've yet to shower or comb my hair, I have a list of errands to tackle today. A threesome is definitely not one of them. So, unless you're going to do my laundry and food shopping—get out. But thank you for the croissants."

"Was she always this pushy?" Draco asked Harry as Hermione stood over them, snapping her fingers and beckoning them out of their seats.

"Yeah; why do you think Ron and I hid from her at school?"

"Oh, shut up!" Hermione chided, shoving them in the direction of her hearth. "Go back to Paris, finish your holiday and you two had better find me a present. I'll see you two later."

* * *

Two weeks later, Hermione found herself on the receiving –threatening – end of Draco's invitations. He and Harry had stayed in Paris for another week, and besides receiving their owls, a few of which carried parcels containing presents, Hermione hadn't laid eyes on the two. But ever since they'd barged in on her, asking if she minded them having a threesome so Harry could experience the touch of a female, the idea remained firmly embedded into her brain.

She hoped that a threesome wouldn't make things awkward after the fact, but apparently Draco and Harry were secure in the knowledge that everything would be fine. Hermione loved Harry as a friend, and alright, she'd grown to love Draco, despite his arrogant ways, but she didn't want to ruin her relationship with either of them.

Although she had to admit...Harry and Draco had grown into two remarkably fit wizards, and the mental image of being naked and caught between them wasn't all that bad. Throw into the mix that she hadn't had a proper shagging in what felt like forever...

"So what did you tell everyone this weekend?" Hermione asked, stretching out on the sofa and enjoying the buttery leather feel of it beneath her feet. "Are they crying and completely bereft because they were unable to feast their eyes upon the magnificent Malfoy and partner on a Saturday night?"

"Don't make me gag you, Granger," Draco threatened lightly as he rolled over onto his side and grabbed her foot. Draco and Harry were lying on the floor while Hermione was lazily draped on the sofa. She'd been well-supplied with her favourite wine and was relaxed right before the point of being pissed, and had taken off her shoes, digging her bare feet into room's thick carpet before placing them on the sofa.

"Is that what he does to you, Harry?" Hermione asked. "Does your boyfriend gag you when he wants you quiet?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, he does," Harry answered thoughtfully, grinning slyly at Draco. "But if the actual gag is in the bedroom and we're out here, we improvise."

"Oh god, forget that I asked," Hermione groaned.

"Get your mind out the gutter," Draco laughed. "I don't always shut him up like _that; _sometimes this works."

With that, he shifted himself on top of Harry and began kissing him in a way that put her and all of her past kisses to shame.

Whoever had taught Draco to kiss certain knew what the hell they were doing, unless his method had been self-taught. Either way, the manner in which he carefully moved his lips and tongue over Harry's certainly made her heart beat faster, and she found herself becoming jealous of her best friend.

"You two work my nerves, do you know that?" Hermione asked when they'd broken apart and grinned cheekily at her.

"And why is that?" Draco asked, pulling Harry into a hug and slipping one hand beneath his jumper.

"You know why," Hermione hissed. "You've met my last boyfriend and you know that he couldn't kiss worth a damn."

"I bet he couldn't do anything else worth a damn," Draco muttered under his breath, causing Harry to snort uncontrollably.

"Hey! Behave," Hermione fussed, although she had to laugh herself.

"That's what you get for dating that useless Muggle," Draco informed, turning around to playfully bite Harry's earlobe.

"I told you before, Draco, all Muggles aren't bad."

"No, I know," he murmured into Harry's neck. "But that last one you dated _was _useless, and it had nothing to do with his Muggle parentage. Bloke probably couldn't take a piss without wetting the front of his trousers."

"Slap him, Harry," Hermione ordered, slowly lifting one hand as if it weighed a tonne. "I don't feel like moving so you'll have to do it."

Harry eyed her for a minute, a sly grin slowly crossing his features as Draco whispered something into his ear. "No, I think Draco should give you a kiss instead."

"You want your boyfriend to kiss me?"

"Yeah, why not? Besides, you agreed to do a lot more than just kiss the both of us, remember?"

"Don't remind me."

"Alright, then."

"Ready to pucker up, Granger?" Draco asked, pursing his perfectly shaped lips in her direction.

"Idiot," Hermione retorted as he heaved himself up from the floor and flopped onto the sofa next to her. Before she had the opportunity to do anything else, Draco was straddling her thighs and planting his lips against hers. Hermione had been on the verge of tugging on his perfectly coiffed blond hair when she learnt firsthand that he actually was a damned good kisser.

Instead of shoving his tongue down her throat or gnawing off her lip, he teasingly brushed his mouth against hers before actually laying a full kiss. His hand was also caressing her face, and he had on that damned cologne that made her head spin the night he'd carried her to bed...

_Oh boy. If his kisses are like this, then you are in __**trouble, **_Hermione told herself, fighting back a moan when Draco's tongue slid sensuously against hers and sent a shiver down her spine.

Almost too nervous to venture a peek in Harry's direction, Hermione plucked up her nerve and did so anyway, finding that her friend was watching them intently with a little smile on his lips.

_Little prat; he's __**enjoying **__this! But Draco really is good at this...too good..._

Hermione's musing was interrupted when Draco stopped, beckoning Harry to come over and take his place. It turned out that the black-haired wizard kissed nearly the same way, although his fingers veered to the back of her neck, and Hermione found herself moaning softly into his mouth.

It wasn't fair at all. Either she had imbibed too much wine or these two really did know how to snog her senselessly. Either way, Hermione thought that they ought to give out lessons to the less fortunate.

Somewhere along the way Harry had shifted them both on the sofa, and she was perched atop his thighs with her breasts mashed against his chest. She could feel Draco's grey eyes burning into her back, but was so enthralled with his boyfriend's kisses that she was disinclined to stop. The shocker was when she felt another set of hands on her body. Long fingers swept her curls from her neck and soft lips pressed into her nape, causing another ripple of pleasure throughout her body.

"Damn, Granger, do you know that you think loudly?" Draco asked as his teeth gently sank into the side of her neck while his fingers slipped underneath the hem of her shirt.

"Do you know that you're in severe danger of having your bollocks hexed off?" Hermione asked breathlessly when his lips touched another spot that made her shiver.

"I'm rather attached to them, if you don't mind," Draco pointed out. "Now do you mind if I take over while Harry watches?"

"No, just tell me what you want me to do,' Hermione replied, eyeing him suspiciously. "It better not be anything too outlandish."

"You mean more outlandish than this?" Harry piped in, gesturing with a pointed finger to the three of them. "I'd say this is outlandish as it gets."

"Fine. Whatever. Draco, what do you want me to do?"

"Well, first it would be nice if you were undressed," he stated pointedly while looking at her jeans. "This is a hands-on lesson, after all."

Tempted to kick Draco but resisting, Hermione rose from the sofa and slid out of her jeans. She was just about to do the same with her knickers when Draco stopped her.

"You can leave those on for now. But your shirt and bra can go, too."

"Should I even ask?" Hermione muttered, although her shirt and bra was removed and dropped onto the heap of crumpled jeans.

"No. Now sit back down, please," Draco asked with mock politeness.

Hermione was secretly grateful for the blond's continuing snark; his sass was something she was used to and put her somewhat at ease, in spite of her only clothing now consisting of the tiniest scrap of lace. A tiny scrap of lace that had fully captured Draco's attention.

"Damn, Granger," he began, looking up from her knickers to her breasts. "You have a pretty set of tits."

"Umm...thank you?"

"Right, sit next to me," Draco then directed, patting the space of sofa next to him. "Harry, you sit on the other side or on the floor, wherever's easiest."

"You know, I'm glad you've taken control of things," Hermione told him, "because I have no idea how a threesome is supposed to go."

"Me neither, but I'm sort of winging it as I go. Anyway, Harry, pay attention."

Harry opted to sit on Hermione's left side, although he had one leg curled beneath him and was paying rapt attention to the two before him. Draco took a minute to transfigure a few squashy pillows for Hermione to recline on, and waited until she was comfortably sitting back before continuing.

"First thing you should know, Harry, is girls don't like their breasts to be mauled or gnawed on like a piece of meat. Well, some might, but I've not met any that liked it."

"I don't mind them being _lightly_ bitten," Hermione chimed in, lifting her head slightly. "But mauled? No, thank you."

"And that brings me to my next point," Draco continued after a brief nod. "You should always ask what they like. It's actually not all that different than you asking me. Next, if you do something and want to know if they like it, they might not always tell you. Listen to her sounds and pay attention to her body's reaction. Although, if you do something wrong you might get smacked in the head."

"I wouldn't smack Harry," said Hermione. "You, maybe, Draco..."

"Right, right," Draco grumbled. "As I was saying: body language. For example..."

Cupping her right breast with one slender hand and bowing his white-blond head, Draco began circling his tongue around Hermione's nipple. His little chat with Harry had made her a bit eager for him prove his point, and again, he delivered. Apparently he remembered her input about liking them lightly teased, because he gently caught the erect teat between both lips, carefully sinking his front teeth into it before continuing with broad swirls of his tongue.

"See what I mean?" Draco asked Harry when Hermione let out an impatient hiss when he paused. "You have to make sure she likes it else you're just wasting her time. I'm going to assume Hermione likes it because she hasn't told me to stop. Granger, how am I doing?"

"Oh, will you just bloody keep at it?!"

"Touché. I guess this is a good time to mention that if they like what you're doing, keep going. That goes double for when you're dealing with a witch has a mile-wide streak of violence like Miss Bookworm here."

Before Hermione could threaten Draco again, he began teasing her nipple with the tip of his tongue. Upon feeling his mouth, Hermione sank back into the pillows and closed her eyes. Either Draco was silently beckoning for Harry to follow his lead, or he'd taken his own initiative, but she was too preoccupied to notice. Yet she was definitely able to distinguish Harry's hands, which were a tad rougher than Draco's, cupping her other breast and guiding it to his mouth.

Even though Harry's hands were more callused than his boyfriend's, his touch was lighter and Hermione writhed on the sofa, attempting to push herself further against him. Thank gods Harry was able to take a hint, because Hermione preferred to spend her time relishing in the sensation of four hands and two mouths lavishing attention upon her instead of giving instruction.

There was a sudden sensation of limbs shifting and the sofa dipping beneath her. Draco grabbed onto her leg and allowed it to rest against his; Harry did the same with the other and she was left with splayed thighs and what she was sure were now dampened knickers.

A stroke so light that it felt unintentional swiped down the lacy crotch, but another stroke that had a bit more force behind it made her know that the first had been deliberate. Fingertips glided up and strummed over her clitoris, yet annoyingly kept moving whenever she rocked into the touch.

"See, you don't want to just dive right in," Draco was telling Harry in a low voice. "You want to warm her up a bit before the main event."

"How do you know so much about this, Draco?" Hermione asked suspiciously, desperately trying to keep her hips still when his teasing fingers kept moving away from where she need most. "You have more insight than any of my old boyfriends and I think you've gotten more of a reaction out of me than all them put together."

"Quiet, Granger," he chided, tickling the inside of her thigh. "I've never divulged my secrets and I won't begin now."

"Well I will say this explains my first time with you," said Harry casually to his boyfriend, his voice trailing off as if he was reminiscing.

"And if memory serves me correctly, you damn near flew apart before I was able to really get started," Draco teased.

"And I seem to remember that you didn't mind."

"Hell no, I didn't mind. I was flattered, actually. It was a bit of a turn-on, even if you shot into my hair."

"Excuse me," Hermione interrupted, glaring down at the two wizards who had each of her legs on their laps. "I apologise for breaking up your cosy little chat, but would you mind carrying on? I feel like I'm on fire but you two keep bloody stopping to talk!"

Throwing her head back and waiting for Draco to continue, she missed the wide-eyed yet amused look shared between him and Harry. Draco went on with explaining what he was doing, but Hermione didn't mind as his fingers had also resumed stroking her, this time with more fervour.

Just as she was getting into the slow circles being drawn over the hood of her clit, the tip of a blunt, short fingernail scraped the underside of the lace-covered sensitive nub, causing her to yelp and her legs to shake.

"Was that a good scream or a bad scream?"

"That was a 'good and please do it again scream', Malfoy," Hermione advised grimly, resorting back to usage of his last name, which she only did when he was being smug.

Another round of those teasing scratches had the seat of her knickers sodden, and Hermione found herself disinclined to complain when Draco suggested that he remove them.

"Harry's not the only one getting a lesson here," Hermione grudgingly admitted she lifted her hips. Draco smirked as he slid his fingers beneath the waistband of her underwear and expertly removed them. "You know how to manouevre around my bits better than me. What kind of rubbish is that?"

"Are you bothered because you aren't the only one to know things?" Draco cheekily enquired, which even Harry was unable to not laugh at.

"Yes," Harry answered for Hermione, knowing how his best friend began when she was the last to find out something. "But I don't think she's all that bothered. Are you, Hermione?"

"I would say not," Draco mused, slipping a finger in between her folds and gathering a copious amount of clear, sticky juices. "Well, perhaps hot and bothered. Isn't that right?"

Refusing to dignify that with a response, Hermione clenched her jaw and shifted on the sofa until she was comfortable again. Draco and Harry had kept her thighs spread, and a quick look down showed them to be peering intently at her cunt. She usually kept her pubic hair trimmed neatly, but remembering Draco's joke about his own area being completely bare, she did the same. Apparently he remembered the joke as well, because their eyes met briefly as they exchanged silent guffaws.

Hermione still found this entire situation to be completely out of character for all three of them. At the same time, it was strangely erotic, and she had no plans of backing out. In anticipation of the blessed event, Hermione had also made sure to exfoliate every inch of her body before shaving. It hadn't been for naught, because Harry had taken to running his fingers over the top of her thigh while listening to Draco.

Lapsing into silence again while hoping that Draco had more tricks up his sleeve, Hermione paid scant attention to him telling Harry about the function of a clitoris, that it was just as sensitive as the head of his cock and to not be too rough.

_Good on you, Draco, _Hermione silently praised. At least he knew that much; one bloke rubbed her with fingers so dry it felt as if he were trying to start a fire, not to mention that he'd pressed down too hard on the tender bud. She didn't know that her clitoris could ache until after the fact, and she'd seriously contemplated taking paracetamol to stop the throbbing.

But Draco obviously knew what he was doing. He lightly toyed with her inner labia using just his fingertips, teasing and spreading them to expose her rosy inner flesh. The entire time he explained something to Harry about boys wanking off and that he could do something similar to her, taking into consideration that her clitoris was a nice size. Hermione dimly wondered what the hell Draco was on about until she felt his fingers move away and come back with something slick covering them—most likely his saliva. He then grasped onto the hood of her clit and literally began tugging on it as if it were a miniature cock.

"Oh, fuck!" Hermione bellowed, nearly jumping out of her skin and accidentally kicking Harry in the ribs.

"Too much?" she heard Harry ask through a wince as he rubbed his side where her heel had struck.

Unable to speak and shaking her head emphatically, Hermione arched her back and encouraged Draco to do it again. Or Harry could touch her; it really didn't matter to her at that point. She just wanted to come, and soon.

Raising both arms above her head, clutching onto the back of the sofa and burying her face into her bicep, Hermione moved her hips along with the rhythm of Draco's fingers, not wanting him to stop until she reached completion. But it seemed that he had other plans, because those two wonderfully adroit fingers left her and she nearly cried outright.

"There's this as well," Draco was now explaining, and Hermione felt him sliding off the sofa. She ventured a guess that he was kneeling on the floor, because she felt him in front of her.

"How the hell do you expect to learn anything if you stay over there?" she heard him ask Harry. "Come closer; you can hold her leg back. Hermione, do you mind holding onto the other one? It'll be easier for Harry to see what I'm doing."

_No. Nope, I don't mind at all._

Freeing one hand from its clutches on the sofa, Hermione hooked her arm beneath her knee and brought her leg back as far as possible. She was well and truly exposed by now, with her knees nearly to her chest and her bum at the edge of the sofa.

Draco ran his palms over her stomach and down to her mons a few times. The caresses felt good but only made worse her longing for more, and Hermione felt the urge to press her thighs together to direct pressure onto her needy clit.

"You don't mind if I...?" Draco trailed off, leaving the tail end of his question unspoken.

Hermione propped herself up and looked down at Draco as if he'd suddenly sprouted two extra heads.

"Are you seriously asking me this now?"

"What? I just remember that not everyone likes oral sex. Stop looking at me like that, Granger."

"Harry...is he serious?"

"Don't look at me," Harry chortled, shrugging his shoulders as he looked between his best friend and boyfriend. "I sure as hell don't mind when Draco goes down on me."

"Well, it's true—everyone doesn't like it," Draco haughtily stated as he curled both arms around Hermione's thighs and tugged until her bum was repositioned at the edge of the sofa. "I'm assuming your flippant dismissal of my question is a _no,_ you don't mind if I go down on you."

"No, I don't," Hermione replied with mock sweetness.

"Good," Draco continued. "Because I've not done this for some time and it would be a shame to stop now. Harry, stop sniggering and pay attention."

Harry muttered some sarcastic reply under his breath that make Hermione laughed. A sharp glance from Draco, however, silenced them both.

"Better behave," Harry whispered. "A brassed off Malfoy is not a Malfoy you want to be near."

"Especially since he's close to your best friend's bits," Draco added from the floor. "Now are you going to shut your mouth or not?"

Just as Hermione was about to ask cheekily just to whom Draco was referring, a warm and very wet tongue slowly swiped up the length of her slit. She didn't realise that she'd actually let out the swear that had been uttered inside her head until Harry told her, "Yeah; I had that same reaction my first time with him, too."

"Yeah, and you nearly came in my eye!" Draco retorted, pausing from licking Hermione to glower at his boyfriend.

"First it's your hair, now it's your eye," Harry chuckled. "Make up your mind, Draco."

"Well it _would_ have been my eye had I not ducked in time. And for the record, you did get your spunk in my hair. I made you wash it out, remember?"

"Yeah, you did, you pompous git."

"Excuse me?!" Hermione cried, puffing up with indignation at the casual insults being thrown around as she lie naked and aroused between the two wizards. "Can you save the domestics for another time, please? Or at least wait until I come, because Draco, if you stop now, I _swear _I will hex off every strand of that pretty blond hair of yours, and you'll never have to worry about Harry messing it up again."

"Right. Sorry, Hermione," Draco apologised, lowering his face to her snatch again and sucking her very erect clitoris in between his lips.

Closing her eyes and focusing on the sensation, Hermione silently thanked whatever licentious deity that led Draco to not pull up the hood of her clitoris, something she always hated. The too-direct contact was always unpleasant and usually made her too sensitive to the touch. Instead, he used his fingers to spread her pussy lips apart sideways, causing her clit to slightly poke out.

The first two torturously slow licks caused Hermione to dig her short nails into the leather beneath her. By the third one, she was unable to remain still, and her back arched sharply while one hand reached down to grab onto Draco's flawless hair. Surprisingly, he didn't fuss or swat her hands away. In the back of her mind Hermione reminded herself to not pull too hard, but it was becoming increasingly difficult to control her body's reactions as Draco alternated between licking and suckling on the sensitive nub. A few times he paused to rub little circles onto it with the pad of his thumb, and Hermione's felt her hips levitate seemingly of their own accord to urge him on.

The consistent, evenly-paced strokes of his tongue were rapidly bringing Hermione closer to her peak, and unbeknownst to her she began gnawing on her bottom lip. Just as she felt the slow burn of her impending climax washing over her body, Draco pulled away, but not before giving her one last soft lick, and Hermione nearly blew up.

"Relax, Granger. It's Harry's turn."

"But I was about to come, you idiot!" Hermione spat, shifting to sit completely upright and digging her toes into Draco's side. Never in her life had she felt so frustrated, not to mention utterly aroused.

"I know," Draco told her loftily, and Hermione was tempted to kick him again. "That's why I stopped; I wanted Harry to have the honour of...finishing you off."

The blond devil had the nerve to wink at her, and all that did was deepen Hermione's glare.

"Oh, will you fix your face, witch! You'll scare Harry."

"I'm not scared," Harry interjected. "Well, not that much. I've been on the receiving end of Hermione's wrath more times than I can count, but this one reaches new heights."

Slumping back onto the sofa, Hermione covered her flushed face with both hands.

"You two are KILLING me," she grumbled into her palms. The patch of sofa beneath her was slick with her juices, and each time she moved the wetter her inner thighs became. Her pussy was literally throbbing, and it nearly hurt to be so close to orgasm only to have it thwarted. To hell with that, Draco _deserved _to be kicked.

"Harry, you'd better hurry up before she actually does kill you," Draco suggested, sitting on the sofa next to Hermione and gesturing for Harry to take his place.

"Alright..." Harry trailed off dubiously. "But Hermione, just so you know, I don't think I'll be as good as Draco."

"Harry, honestly, that doesn't matter," Hermione reassured him, uncaring that her tone was laden with desperation. "I'm so close—rather, I w_as—_that it probably won't take much."

"If you say so, but I'm warning you now—don't complain."

"Oh...shut up, Harry, and lick me!"

"Bloody fucking hell, Granger. Are you part wildcat?"

"Shut up, Malfoy!"

"Shutting up."

Hermione and Draco watched as Harry slid off the sofa and got to his knees between her thighs. He had to pull her back to the sofa's edge, just like Draco had, to get her properly aligned. While he still looked hesitant, he didn't need much coaching, because he pushed her thighs back as far as they would go and literally dove in face first.

"For fuck's sake, Potter, don't you think you can take off your glasses?" Draco asked in an aggrieved tone.

"No, you idiot. You know I'm blind without them. Won't even be able to see your ugly face."

"Watch it, you."

_"Ha-rry!"_ Hermione whined impatiently, nudging the side of his head with her knee to make him continue.

Harry's touch was a bit rougher than Draco's; he had a bit of stubble on his chin, compared to his smooth-faced boyfriend, but his tongue work proved to be just as efficient. Only once did Hermione have to politely ask that he lick a bit harder, and she nearly flew apart when he did.

For someone that had doubted his skills, Harry turned out to enjoy the taste of a woman. He nuzzled his face into her soaking wet flesh, leaving no area untasted or untouched. Somehow Hermione's thighs ended up becoming draped over his broad shoulders, and Harry held onto her waist with two strong hands. Most likely he was trying to keep her from squirming all over the couch, but Hermione really couldn't help it; Harry was following Draco's instruction to the letter, and currently had her clitoris firmly trapped between his pursed lips, tugging on it in a way that made her legs quiver.

Luckily for Harry, she opted to grab onto the sofa instead of his hair, because he just might have been rendered bald by the time they were through. Some small part of her mind registered that she was probably scratching Draco, as he was perched next to her.

"Use your fingers," she heard Draco murmur as his arm slid across her belly, obviously showing something to his boyfriend. Hermione wasn't bothered enough to open her eyes and missed the exchange, but she did anticipate being fingered. The very thought was making her insides clench. "Remember what I said: be easy. Use one, then work your way up to two."

Such a clinical explanation Draco gave; all the same, his words continued to literally have an effect on her body. While Harry's tongue continued lapping at her, one thick finger was being slowly pressed into her spasming cunt. It took a bit of manoeuvering on Hermione's part until he was touching where she needed most, but the careful addition of a second finger made her shriek.

Between Harry licking and fucking her with his fingers, and now Draco teasing her right nipple with the flat of his tongue, Hermione dimly wondered how the hell she hadn't yet fallen to pieces. For whatever reason, Draco deemed it appropriate to move from her side and next to Harry on the floor, and Hermione keenly noticed the difference.

"Now keep going, but use just one finger," Draco directed, sounding as if he was also between her legs.

Harry did as he was told, and Hermione wanted to protest until she felt what she assumed was Draco's finger taking its place.

"You must be something right; she has your entire hand soaked," Draco mused, moving his finger inside her and alongside Harry's, but pressing its tip in the opposite direction. "I can feel her pussy squeezing my fingers, she's definitely about to come. Whatever you do, don't stop."

_Yes, whatever you do, don't stop or I'll kill you! _Hermione screamed in her head. One peek down to the end of the sofa showed Harry, his messy-haired head almost completely buried between her legs as his mouth remained firmly attached to her cunt. His middle finger was steadily pumping inside her, and Draco was simultaneously using his index to also press into a spot that made her break out into goosebumps from head to toe. His grey eyes remained attached to the sight of his boyfriend getting off his best friend, and he looked vaguely pleased; turned on, even, Hermione surmised.

But seconds later, the pressure of a smaller finger, Draco's pinky, was felt against her arsehole. Harry's saliva and her slick juices made for an easy entry. Hermione never had that part of her played with but she was happy to have Draco change that.

"Gods, Granger," he began in an oddly husky voice, "I thought your cunt was tight but your arse is another story. Have you never been fucked here?"

"No, but you can if you want to later on," Hermione moaned breathlessly, writhing her hips for him and Harry to keep going. "But I swear on everything I love, if you two stop now I will destroy you."

She heard Draco chortle but at least he followed her wishes. It was too much, having her clit perfectly licked and kissed while being fingered by two different hands. At some point their hands switched positions, and Draco's finger rubbed and massaged the top of her walls, making Hermione rake her nails against the sofa. Combined with her arse being fingered and a few final tugs of Harry's lips drawing on her clit, Hermione soon came so hard that she forgot her name for a second. Her screams were more of a screech, although they didn't last that long. It was her body that refused to stop shaking, and she was unaware that she came close to falling off the sofa until a hand—she couldn't tell whose—pressed against her stomach to keep her lying flat against the cushions.

Harry eventually moved his mouth away from her, but he and Draco kept their hands in place, pulling more cries of pleasure from her as they steadily fingered her to another orgasm.

"Did you mean what you said before?" Draco asked once Hermione had finally caught her breath. She was red-faced and her skin was damp with perspiration from being sent over the edge so many times, and she had to beg for both boys to stop for a minute.

"What, about you taking me from behind, literally?" she panted, watching as Draco gave a short nod. "Yes, I meant it. I don't think there's anything I would turn down at this point."

"Alright then, maybe later," Draco replied, sneaking a hand down to the tented front of Harry's trousers. "But I think someone else needs to come, too. "

"Oh, am I the only one?" asked Harry, peering down as Draco expertly unfastened his belt and jeans. "Because don't think I haven't noticed your cock about to make a hole in your seam."

"As if I would deny the obvious," Draco retorted, sitting back so Harry could also undress him.

Hermione's body still tingled with the after effects of her release, and she stayed silent as the two wizards disrobed one another. Prior to this day she never really looked at Harry or Draco in 'that way', but she hadn't been blind to their charms, either. Both were incredibly good-looking and maintained lean, muscular enough physiques honed by hours of Quidditch that raised many an eyebrow, be it witch or wizard. 'Fit' was a perfect word to describe the two.

"Wait, are we going to do this here?" Hermione asked, trying to tear her eyes away from two very erect cocks there were in her line of vision. "The sofa might be a bit small."

"Hermione has a point," Harry countered, reaching down to wrap his hand around Draco's cock. "Might as well go to the bedroom now."

Once the three were situated in the middle of a bed that seemed big enough for six people, Hermione was coaxed onto her back and Harry moved between her legs. She reasoned that he had been well turned-on by going down on her, because his erection barely waned. After assuring him and Draco that she was using contraception, Harry rubbed the tip of his cock along her slit, gathering up moisture before slowly pressing inside.

The expression on his face was a bit comical, yet was a clear expression of his reaction to being inside a woman for the first time. Draco had finally convinced him to remove his glasses, and it was odd seeing Harry without them. In the meantime, Hermione vaguely wondered how long it would take her to come again. Harry's cock fit inside her rather nicely; he was thick enough that she didn't feel like she was being split in half, and long enough to render deep strokes that didn't make him slip out on the outstroke.

Once Harry began fucking her steadily, all with Draco's silent approval, Hermione cracked her eyes to see the blond kneeling at her side, his hand moving steadily over his own erection. Draco Malfoy had always been a pretty boy, but his cock also matched that description. Similar in girth and length to Harry's, it had a slight upright curve, and Hermione found herself wanting to suck him off.

Reaching out to tug on his thigh, she was glad when Draco took the hint and moved closer. Hermione wasted no time in turning her head and wrapping her lips around his shaft, greedily sucking on him just like he'd done to her.

Thoughtfully slipping one of his pillows beneath Hermione's head to keep her neck from hurting, Draco propped himself further up on his knees and began slowly fucking her mouth. Gone was the arrogant look from his pale, pinched features; in its place was pure, unadulterated lust, so consuming that it seemed to make the wizard forget about anything else. A quick glance at Harry showed him to have his eyes tightly squeezed shut, as a droplet of sweat made its way from his hairline and paused at his temple.

It was incredibly thrilling to be caught between the two; the cadence of Harry's thrusts were increasing steadily, and the feel of Draco's cock sliding past her lips only fueled her arousal. In a fit of...something, Harry had clutched onto her behind and lifted her hips higher, pulling her back to meet his pounding thrusts that were becoming more erratic. Gone was the somewhat bashful wizard, and in its place was a more dominant, almost feral one that was seconds away from making her explode. Coupled with Draco face-fucking her and knowing that she was responsible for his steadily increasing incoherence was a heady thing.

"Hold off, you git!" she heard Draco suddenly shouting at Harry, whose groans had become louder.

"Piss off, Draco," Harry snapped back, although his thrusts tapered off somewhat. "Holding off is bloody easier said than done."

"Actually, I don't mind if it ends right this minute, so long as we pick things back up," Hermione offered in between licking around Draco's shaft. "All I know is, if you interrupt one more of my orgasms, you are going to meet a sticky end."

"I don't need to be told twice," Harry ground out, clutching onto Hermione's thighs and pushing more forcefully into her. That unexpected move firmly embedded him deep within her, and it didn't take long for Hermione to cry out, lurching sharply as her orgasm swiftly overtook her. Harry was doing a lot of huffing and puffing, swirling his hips in a way that was surely going to make her come again. Just as expected, Hermione forgot about Draco's cock at her lips as her walls clenched around Harry, pulsating almost violently.

At that point, Hermione didn't care if Harry came or not; she felt well and truly shagged, and had every intention of rolling over for a nap. However, she was surprised when Draco moved from beside her head and took his place behind his boyfriend, who was still leisurely thrusting into her.

The blond wound his slender arms around his mate's torso, languidly stroking his fingertips along Harry's chest before moving higher to play with his nipples.

"You tell me to hold off and then do that?" Harry hissed, dropping his head backwards onto Draco's shoulder.

"Oh, shut up," Draco purred into his ear, catching the flat erect nipple between two fingers, "before I do this." Moving his other arm behind Harry's back, it was clear that Draco was doing something to his arse because his entire body tensed against Hermione.

"Fuck, Draco!" he nearly roared, picking up the pace and plunging his erection further into the aroused witch, who had literally trembled at the feral sound that gushed from his lips.

Harry was obviously on the edge, and the sight on his firm body being caressed by his lover's hands while he fucked her was immensely erotic.

"That's it," Draco whispered encouragingly into his ear. "Make her come, and then I want to see you come."

Harry needed no further persuasion; he brought Hermione to another rapid climax, and just before he was able to spill inside her, Draco made him pull out and reached down to wrap a hand around his wet cock. Using his other hand, Draco fisted a handful Harry's dark hair and roughly tugged his head around for a bruising kiss, all the while grinding his hips into Harry's backside and firmly tugging on his angry erection.

That sight was nearly too much for Hermione, and without realising it, her hand had slipped between her legs to assuage the renewed ache in her clitoris. Draco was relentless with his hands and mouth, and soon Harry let out something between a whine and a moan, which was barely muffled in spite of him being kissed, and his cock twitched and furiously spurted its release onto Hermione's stomach and hand.

Still breathing hard, Harry collapsed on the bed next to Hermione, too replete to bother opening his eyes for several minutes.

"So...I take it you enjoyed that?" Hermione asked, unable to help herself.

It looked as if Harry was having trouble with making his lips move. Finally, he answered, "Yeah. I see what Draco was talking about."

"I usually am right," Draco interrupted, "even if you refuse to admit it."

"That's nice and all, but do you think you can help me with this?" Hermione held up her hand, revealing its sticky surface.

"Sorry about that," Harry apologised, reaching around to touch his lower back. "Draco got me, too, so I guess it's only fair."

"Be that as it may, I want to lie down comfortably without being all...moist," Hermione countered, still holding out her hand and waiting for one of them to cast a cleansing charm.

"You know, I forgot you two were the royal whingers," said Draco, sliding off the bed and giving Harry and Hermione a lovely view of his pale, muscular backside. "I think I left my wand in my trouser pocket. Might the lord and lady need anything while I'm up?"

"That would be nice, peasant," Hermione answered. "Water, and if there's more wine, I'd love that as well."

"I'm going to ignore that peasant jab," Draco sniffed. "Harry? Speak now or forever hold your peace. Although it's not as if you're a guest here. Never mind. You'll drink whatever I bring back."

"See the abuse I get?" Harry said to Hermione when Draco left the room. "I ought to spank his arse red."

"So is that what you two do, give one another cheek and then play kinky spanking games?"

The naughty smile on Harry's face answered her question, and Hermione laughed.

"You two are odd. Not that I can say anything; here I am, shamelessly naked while I let you two have your way with me."

"So how am I doing so far?"

Hermione stared at Harry for a minute. "Do you really need to ask?"

"Hmm, probably not, but Draco's rubbed off on me and I like having my ego stroked."

"...you two make me sick. Anyway, Draco's taking too long to get his wand so I'm going to shower. Where's the bathroom?"

"Right through there," Harry replied, gesturing to two doors across the room. "Towels and everything are already in there, but if you need something else just let me know."

One shower in decadent bathroom that could only belong to a Malfoy and twenty minutes later, Hermione found herself prone on Harry and Draco's bed. Draco had taken it upon himself to 'do _something_ with her hair', as he phrased, and Hermione was in no position to decline. She had no qualms with letting someone else battle the tangles in her damp hair, and it turned out that Draco actually knew his way around curls. Even if she had to ignore his muttering about her needed to have a chat with his father so she could learn from him the charm he used to keep his hair sleek.

Harry lay on his stomach across from the two, engaged by the sight of Draco working out the snarls in Hermione's hair with his comb. Soothed by the sensation of someone else grooming her, Hermione closed her eyes and waited patiently until Draco was done. She didn't anticipate falling asleep but did just that, and briefly opened her eyes to find that she was alone on the bed. Sounds of the shower running and both wizards splashing about and fussing at one another carried across the room.

What Hermione initially thought to be an odd proposition turned out to be not quite so bad. Things weren't as awkward as she'd anticipated, especially considering that she had done more with Harry and Draco than she had ever done in all her previous sexual encounters combined.

The shower was turned off, and a few minutes later, both wizards stepped back into the bedroom.

"Ah, you're awake," said Draco, rubbing his hair with his towel. "Whenever you're ready for round two, just let us know."

"Round two? Good lord, I didn't realise you two were so randy," Hermione murmured. "I'll do that, but you should know that I'm expecting dinner at some point. I'm not used to marathon shagging like you and Harry."

"Neither are we," Harry replied. "Mostly we go at it for a bit and then fall asleep."

"_Harry_ falls asleep," Draco amended, flashing his boyfriend a knowing look. "But I take that as a job well done on my part, so it's fine by me."

"Nice to see you so humble," Hermione told him wryly.

"So long as you and I both know that he's full of it," Harry added as he folded his towel and set it down. He then smacked Draco's behind.

"Hands off my arse, Potter!"

"You weren't telling me that the other night when my tongue was buried root-deep in it. All I heard was _more, Harry! Faster, Harry! If you don't bleedin' hurry up, Potter! _Anyway...that's _my _arse._"_

Harry perfectly mimicked Draco, even saying his last name in the exact same manner the blond had when they were rivals back in school and stared each other down in passing.

"I didn't know girls became so...w_et _when they came," said Harry, apropos of nothing. "I also didn't know that they could shoot, if that's the word."

Hermione looked confused about this abrupt change in topics, while Draco looked vaguely interested.

"Come again? No pun intended," he asked Harry.

"I think I felt Hermione sort gush onto my tongue when she came, kind of like I would," he explained with a thoughtful look on his face. "Of course, I couldn't really see, since you made me take off my glasses..."

"Of course I made you take off your glasses," Draco groaned. "But I am more than curious to find out what you mean. Hermione, how about another go?"

Hermione thought of Draco's tongue on her again and shivered involuntarily.

"I take that as a yes," Draco continued. "Harry, you can leave your sodding glasses on this time and watch."

Five minutes later, the three were back on the bed. Harry had Summoned his glasses and sat behind Hermione and Draco, who were arranged in a sixty-nine position. Up until that day, Hermione had only been eaten out while lying flat on her back, but arranged herself with enthusiasm over Draco's face when he told her 'I'd love to eat that pretty cunt of yours from the back'.

Now his hands were cupping her arse, gently kneading and massaging the cheeks while his mouth nibbled on her inner thigh. His semi-erect cock was right beneath her face, but Draco told her that she could do what she wanted with it, or not, that his main focus was her at the moment.

When his tongue delicately lapped at her clitoris for the second time that evening, Hermione bucked against his mouth and dug her fingers into the sheets. Now might have been the opportune moment to thank Draco for having the ability to put his tongue to use by doing something other than uttering scathing remarks, but the only thing she could focus on was its warm, flat, and very wet surface slowly lapping over the sensitive bud, causing her to walls to squeeze reflexively.

The urge to thrash about waned slightly, and Hermione allowed herself to fully sink into the length of Draco's body. Resting her head against his solid abdomen, she arched her back and spread her thighs further, the air feeling cooler over each saliva-dampened area. His arms were braced against her thighs while his hands kept her bumcheeks spread. In between doing a swirly thing with his tongue, Draco took to literally fucking her with it. Briefly he teased the ring of her puckered rosebud, before dragging his tongue back down to plunder her hole, then going further to tickle her clit. His tongue almost felt a mile long as it continued dipping into her vagina. While the sensation wasn't as intense compared to others, Hermione still found herself pushing back to keep it there.

"Draco, Draco, fucking hell," Hermione groaned unintelligibly into his skin, feeling as if she was losing her mind with each lick. Why had she never been tongue-fucked before? It felt fucking amazing. Seconds later the lecherous bastard upped his ante, most likely to make her continue moaning, and he began playing with her arsehole, using just the tip of his finger along the edges. Aroused beyond belief and eager for Draco to do whatever he wanted at the moment, Hermione pushed her hips back again, wordlessly begging for more.

That wicked tongue moved back down to her clit, circling steadily around it and making the insides of her thighs tremble. The pressure of that single finger grew, until it slipped past the tight ring of muscles and embedded deeply within her. Two more fingers–judging by the angle, they were most likely Harry's—slid their way inside her other entrance and set up a slow thrusting, causing Hermione to hiss in pleasure. The sublime feel of lips and tongue roving over her clit never stopped, and Hermione was barely aware of the loud moans and grunts coming from her mouth.

It was a heady thing to have two men licking and fingering her arse and cunt, their digits rubbing against one another's through the thin barrier between them and pressing into what felt like every delicious nerve ending.

Draco's mouth was relentless yet unrushed at this point; his suckling retained the same amount of pressure, although it felt as if he had sucked the entire bud of her clitoris into his mouth. Hermione knew there was little hope of her holding out any longer. One, two, three more licks, and another careful nudging of the fingers inside her moving in tandem, and Hermione came so hard that she was unable to see anything in front of her for a several minutes.

The waves of her orgasm had barely subsided when she felt her body being shifted to lie flat. Harry had briefly taken his fingers out of her cunt, and she dimly registered something warm and wet being literally poured between her cheeks. Soon the fingers came back, this time two in her pussy and two in her arse. The feeling was a bit more intrusive, especially the two slim digits in her arse as Hermione almost felt the urge to pull away. Yet when Harry and Draco found a rhythm that worked together, Hermione felt her insides turn to mush.

"I'm going to come again!" she shrieked, clawing at the sheets.

"Not yet," Draco told her, twisting his fingers inside her one last time before withdrawing them. Harry had also pulled his hand back, and Hermione felt strangely empty. Unable to harbour on that thought for a minute longer when Draco straddled her thighs and pressed a hand to the small of her back, Hermione held her breath when she felt while the blunt tip of his cock against her. "I'll go slow, but tell me if I should stop."

"OK," she answered breathlessly.

Slow was probably for the best, but Hermione was too caught up to say so. The head of his cock went in easily enough, most likely due to his careful stretching with his fingers. But when the flared part of his shaft sank in further, Hermione thrashed slightly from the burning sensation. She heard Draco telling Harry to do something, and his fingers were back inside her, moving in a side-to-side motion. Seconds later, the angle of his thrusting fingers changed. Whatever it was Harry was doing differently worked, because intense pleasure shot throughout Hermione's limbs and belly and made her scream. Little by little, Draco's cock moved further, and it might have been uncomfortable if not for Harry's ministrations.

Eventually she felt Draco's balls pressed tightly against her, and he began a steady rhythm into her arse. Harry's hand never stopped moving, and he was now lightly circling the pad of his thumb over her still orgasm-sensitive clitoris.

Hermione felt completely wanton and unashamedly greedy, lying face down while having her arse and greedy pussy filled to the hilt. Somehow Draco knew that she wasn't adverse to dirty talk, because he dug his fingers into her hair and began uttering filthy, sensuous things into her ear that were almost titillating enough to make her come solely by listening to.

Heat washed over her from the top of her head down to the soles of her feet. Her arms and legs trembled, and her cunts and arse pulsed and squeezed around fingers and cock, respectively, until they clamped down tighter and tighter, staying like that on their own until violently convulsing of their own accord. Hermione screamed and clenched onto the duvet, nearly threatening to rip it at the seams, then digging her short nails into Draco's forearms as she lost complete control of her body.

Harry hadn't been lying about her spurting when she came; the insides of her thighs and the bed beneath her became soaking wet, although Hermione noticed nothing except the sweet burst of bliss running throughout her veins.

Soon she found out that multiple orgasms were an added benefit of anal sex, especially when having your pussy rubbed. Draco flipped them both over and had Hermione's back to his chest while keeping his forearms hooked beneath her knees. Harry immediately moved between their legs and had his own engorged cock in his hand, hastily tugging his prick while the heel of his other hand cupped and grazed the top of her pussy. The rough underside of his hand continued delivering a delicious friction, but Hermione was insatiable and wanted more. After practically screaming for him to finger her as well, his thumb pressed its way into her convulsing channel, moving shallowly along with Draco's pistoning cock.

Hermione screamed and shuddered. She grabbed at anything her hands could reach, and then she could feel nothing except for another intense orgasm that left her red-faced and breathless. Finally after coming a third time, which had been set off by Draco moaning out his own release beneath her, her once straining body went completely limp when his thrusting ceased.

"Damn, Draco," Harry was admonishing from somewhere near her feet, "had I known that you were going to nearly kill my friend I might have never asked..."

"Pipe down, Harry," Draco panted, sliding out from beneath Hermione's lax form. He rolled over onto one elbow and used his other hand to move the her hair away from her face and found that her eyes were still closed. "She probably just became a bit overwhelmed. Malfoy, remember? We tend to do that. You should be well familiar with passing out after sex— with me, that is."

Harry rolled his eyes when Draco leered at him. "Do you always have to be so fucking cocky?"

Plucking his wand from the bedside table to sort them all out, Draco took his time staring at his crotch, then at Harry, then back down at his crotch.

"Well...why not?"

"Tell me, did your mum drop you on your head at some point?"

"Be nice, Potter. Now hurry up and cast a drying charm on the sheets before Hermione wakes up in a puddle and screams at you. You know you're still scared of her."

"Too right, I am," Harry chuckled, picking up his wand from where it had been lying beside Draco's. "Hermione's screaming is unlike anyone else's; I'd almost rather a detention from your godfather compared to letting her yell at me."

"Is that right? I'll tell Severus you said so."

"You'd better fucking not. That man isn't as bad as he used to be, but he still scares the shit out of me."

"Well maybe if you'd stop pissing him off whenever we see him..."

"Shut up. You know damn well that all I have to do is _breathe _to make Snape cross."

Draco snorted. "I'll have father speak to him. No, maybe Mum."

"OK, you know what? That's enough talk about Snape and your parents while I'm naked. All of us, for that matter."

"Oh, become shy, have you?" Draco taunted in a syrupy tone. "That didn't stop you from grabbing my crotch at dinner last week. You uncouth prat, you're lucky Mother thought my face was turning red from choking. How the hell could I tell her that I'd gone from nursing a semi to a full salute beneath her handcrafted dining room table?"

By that time, Harry had fallen onto his side and was shaking with silent laughter, trying not to wake a soundly slumbering Hermione.

"It's not funny, you idiot," Draco protested, even though he'd begun to laugh.

"Yes it is!" Harry wheezed, yanking off his glasses and wiping at the tears in his eyes. "I've never seen you become so flustered! I thought you were really were going to choke on that...what the hell were we eating?"

"Kobe-beef. And say I had choked, how would I have explained a sudden erection?"

Harry shrugged and put his glasses back on. "Erotic asphyxiation? Or I'd just tell your parents that you have a problem keeping it in your trousers when I'm around."

"Listen, if you two idiots are going to go at it all night," Hermione's tired-sounding voice suddenly cut in, "let me know now and I'll Apparate home. Otherwise, shut up and let me sleep. And I meant it when I said that I want dinner later on. Don't think you're going to shag me into unconsciousness and not feed me."

With that, she lazily shifted to slide beneath the blankets and pulled them up to her shoulders. She then settled her bushy-curled head into the pillow Harry typically used and promptly fell back asleep.

"Soo..." Draco trailed off, venturing a look at his boyfriend, "what do you reckon'll happen if she wakes up and there's no food?"

Harry stared pointedly at Draco. "Do you really want to chance it and find out?" he finally asked. "And don't say anything about a you-know-what."

"What?" Draco asked dumbly. "A house-elf?"

"NO HOUSE-ELVES!" Hermione yelled shrilly from the other side of the bed before continuing in a normal voice, "I refuse to eat anything that's made by slave labour."

"Well you don't bloody expect me to cook, do you?" Draco challenged, scrambling over on all fours to Hermione's side and peering down into her face.

"Of course not," she replied blithely, keeping her eyes closed and her head snuggled into the pillow. "You're not poisoning me. Either Apparate somewhere or order takeaway. But if I so much as _see_ a house-elf..."

"Fine, Granger, damn," the blond grumbled, unceremoniously sliding off the bed and looking round for his trousers. "Ordered about in my own fucking house...bloody picky-arsed Gryffindors...Harry this is _your_ fault!"

"Hey, I told you not to say it."

"You didn't tell me anything!"

"Oh, quit your whinging and go get my dinner! And two words, Malfoy—warming charm."


End file.
